Nina Turner can kiss my black ass.
Yeah, I said it, and I know the Berners get all wild and loud whenever someone decides to pay Nina enough attention to tell her ratchet ass off, but since they already never leave me the fuck alone, I guess I no longer care if I draw unwanted attention.
From them, any attention is unwanted.
Nina has decided to be the black mouthpiece for the Bernie Sanders campaign, and I don’t like it. She has morphed into a left-wing Omarosa, but in contrast to Manigault, she comes replete with exaggerated blackness, hazardous styling, and unfortunate accessories that would put Diamond and Silk to shame at the Slauson Swap-meet where they purchase their womped out, Easty ass animal print costumes. But I’m not here to talk about how Nina swapped her wrap-dress for a Bernie Sanders cult-robe. These are just jokes, I’m sure I’ll learn to love the robes when Bernie is our Lord and Master.
I’m coming for Nina herself today.
I used to like Nina.
There was a time back in the day when I enjoyed her appearances on MSNBC, but even then I felt like her code switch module needed to be upgraded, because there was no reason every time she got a cool minute to speak she HAD to end up sounding like a 1960s revival meeting in the backwoods behind some run down Southern Plantation. Even before she linked up with Bernie Sanders, you remember, it was when she lost the only statewide race she had an opponent in, I felt like Nina might just be a clown. Naw, it wasn’t her clothes or her unfortunate decision to go blonde while knowing damn well that shit did not go with her undertones; this was back when she still wore those cute little wrap dresses and looked fetch as fuck (fetch WILL happen bitches) when she wanted to. Now she has “*raisin in the potato salad syndrome” to deal with, and her hopes of recovery ain’t looking too hot.
Maybe it’s her self promotional style that irks me, but when it was limited to promoting herself and coining neologisms, I pretty much took it in stride. But now that we have entered the second cycle of Nina using her voice for the Senator with the biggest voice of all, and she uses her voice to trash good Democrats to promote that tired old Marxist Chupacabra, Bernie Mao, I am just about fed the fuck up with her being free to run her big ass mouth with absolutely zero push-back. So, lets push back right the entire fuck now.
I don’t know when the hell this video is from, I don’t give much of a fuck neither.
But I do know this; the performative blackness I see is on the verge of becoming completely clownish minstrelry, and I am not one bit of a goddamn fan.
Wretch, have you lost your whole ass mind? Copies?
“There’s only one!” (Who needs 2 Bernies? Ugh.)
Well, THANK FUCKING GOD FOR THAT BLESSING.
It’s real fucking cute that you wanna play attack dog for the least accomplished old white man to ever sit his vainglorious White Savior ass up in Congress for THIRTY GODDAMN YEARS doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING, but you are the whole fucking fool for ever thinking about signing off on this basic ass MALARKEY of an attack ad calling Kamala a COPY of ANY GODDAMN BODY. On your best day your qualifications can’t match her record from her worst day, with your hating ass.
How the bloody fuck is Kamala Devi Harris any type of a copy of Bernie “Lenin” Sanders?
Did she copy passing only 7 of her own bills in 30 years in Congress?
Did she copy not keeping a steady job until she was 40?
Did she copy being a deadbeat ass Dad?
Did she copy becoming a rape fan-fiction writer?
Did the NRA help elect her?
Did she copy voting against the Brady Bill 5 fucking times?
Did she also copy saying guns in “Chicago” (Black People) and Los Angeles (Latinos & Blacks) were different than guns in Vermont (White People)?
Did she copy avoiding Black Activists in her State until this very day?
Did she copy having women being 0 of her top 10 highest paid staffers?
Did she copy railing against Luxury Fundraising Retreats while attending Luxury Fundraising Retreats?
Nope. She didn’t copy any of that shit.
So, what exactly did she copy?
I know you’re not trying to say SANDERS came up with or was first to introduce “Medicare for All” or a type of Single Payer System?
In 1943, my father was one of the first people to introduce comprehensive health care reform in Congress, a single-payer system for all.
— John Dingell (@JohnDingell) March 21, 2017
Shut your Clown ass the fuck on up with this bullshit ass fairy tale.
Bernie isn’t the first to do shit the fuck all, and to be frank, he isn’t even the one who was introducing it every year; that honor goes to the late John Conyers who introduced it WHILE BERNIE WAS IN CONGRESS WITH HIM. Bernie’s name is right there as one of the co-sponsors, so just like you’re the replete, unabridged, outright, absolute fucking ass-clown, Bernie is the categorical, ultimate, unreduced, whole hog of a fraud. Maybe you should slow your entire fucking roll while you’re out there letting Bernie pit your black ass against our black asses like a Mayonnaise Mascot to some White Flight looking ass struggle victims of the fakest “Revolution” in history? Bernie ain’t gonna be around forever to provide you with a platform from which to spew your Televangelism style minstrelry, so you might wanna not burn every goddamn bridge in existence. Then again, maybe you don’t give a fuck. It’s all good, there will always be job openings for Professors at Clown College, and we all know for fact that you’re more than qualified.
Keep Kamala’s name out your mouth.
*Raisin in the potato salad syndrome is a Terminal Illness with no known cure. It occurs when Black People get around their white friends and wild the fuck out. In some case sufferers begin dressing like white people, wearing the same color make-up (that does not go), dyeing or bleaching their hair the same color (that does not go), and hating on their fellow Black People for the amusement and benefit of white people. Note: it is not necessary that a style change occur to be a sufferer of the disease, many victims are asymptomatic, (e.g. Ben Carson, Bill Cosby). There are sufferers who have been known to spontaneously rid themselves of the disease without treatment. Others saw their illness progress until they were unrecognizable even to white people (e.g. Michael Jackson) and eventually succumbed to associated diseases or perils. Many victims are documented; their names and case files have been made known to Black People to ensure the infection does not spread. Cases, like that of Stacy Dash, are unknown to Black People because we don’t know her AT ALL. Please don’t give her our phone numbers. We never met her.