There he is!! Thief! Thief!! Red Alert!!! Hold me back, y’all!!
What the entire fuck is going on? I was 900 words into a different post when this news alert came across my screen:
Tom Steyer aide stole Kamala Harris’ SC volunteer data from 2020 presidential voter file
Um? What, bitch? Who the fuck is running the goddamn databases at the DNC that just lets ANY fucking campaign into Kamala’s goddamn data files? And why pick Kamala’s? Joe has way more folks. It’s like Bernie 2016 was reborn in Steyer 2020! WHY ARE YOU EVEN RUNNING, DUDE? Do you not have enough privilege yet, or how much more do you need? King? Will you go home if we make you King? NO. You’ll never be King. That’s Kamala’s job too.
I guess this is like that thing where Liz steals Kamala’s catch phrases because her little bleached personality is blanderiffic, so she can’t think of her own. Whatever, but that data, tho, what the fuck is even going on, DNC?
From Post and Courier:
A South Carolina aide for Tom Steyer’s 2020 presidential campaign stole valuable volunteer data collected by Kamala Harris’ campaign using an account from when he worked with the S.C. Democratic Party, according to multiple state and national party officials.
Ain’t this about a bitch and a half? Y’all, I am not in the goddamn mood for any new foolfuckery!!
The Democratic National Committee quickly caught the attempt on Friday by Steyer’s deputy S.C. state director Dwane Sims to export Harris’ data, which contained thousands of volunteer contacts collected over the course of the campaign in this critical early-voting primary state.
OOOOOOOOOHHHH! So, dude got caught RED HANDED. Oh, INDEED.
The party sent a cease-and-desist letter and has since received certification from Sims that he destroyed the stolen data, S.C. Democratic Party chairman Trav Robertson told The Post and Courier. The Steyer campaign said it does not have possession of the data.
Oh. Sure, Jan. Of course you don’t have any of that data or any other data that he stole that y’all didn’t get caught trying to access. I always take a powerful billionaire who is running to obtain more power at his word when he says “Honest Abe! I would NEVER steal data, we cut it up and threw it away.” Is that the story?
And who is this “Sims” guy anyway?(pleasedontlethimbeblackplease!)
“We take this matter very seriously, and that is why we immediately worked with the DNC to disable this employee’s access to Vote Builder,” said S.C. Democratic Party chairman Trav Robertson, referring to the voter file system. “It is critical that the Steyer campaign take immediate action regarding their employee.”
Um, yeah…I don’t know. You just don’t seem upset enough for me, I’m sorry. If this was Star Search, I’d rate your upsettedness at about, meh, I’d say 1 3/4 Stars. That’s not good. You can get up to like 4 stars, maybe 5. It’s been a long time. Why did he even have access? I don’t know anything about data management, and that is mad inconvenient at the moment. Oh, and this part, “It is critical that the Steyer campaign take immediate action regarding their employee.” SHUT UP.
Sims was placed on administrative leave over the weekend while the Steyer campaign conducts an internal investigation, Steyer campaign spokesman Alberto Lammers said.
Oh. So, like a cop? Niiiiice! I would have been fired, just saying. I actually would have resigned in shame, written an unreccommended, inopportune, and reckless confessional, posted it, got trolled and abused, cried, and deleted all of my social media accounts that people know about. I’d probably have done it even if I wasn’t guilty, so, I fully expect to have this happen one day. Let us know when y’all finish investigating yourselves, kay? Thanks.
Sims also is permanently banned from the voter file and all Democratic Party systems, Democratic National Committee spokeswoman Xochitl Hinojosa said.
How dumb are you, dude? I mean, not intellectually or abilitywise, but common sensewise? Very. You know they can’t let you come back to work now, even if it was a stupid group plot, right? What were you even thinking?
Before joining the Steyer campaign, Sims was the voter file manager at the S.C. Democratic Party, giving him access to the proprietary data each campaign collects by contacting voters and potential volunteers.
Dude. You know you coulda gone back and worked there after the campaign, right? And you know Steyer isn’t going to win, right? Hold the fuck up. I just got an alert from Twitter and I’m about to lose my shit.
What the fuck. So, now y’all saying that nobody did anything at all and the whole DNC catching you in the act is bullshit? Dios mio! Mon Dieu! Mein Gott! Боже мой! Oh, Lord.
Let’s see what else the Post and Courier had to say before I wrap this up:
After Sims left the state party in September, Robertson said the party followed standard protocol by disabling his access to party accounts. But Sims was able to gain access to the Harris’ data using a separate training account that had been inadvertently left active after Sims created it.
What the fuck? Why would you use the training account, Sims? You’re not working there anymore, even if you could access something, you shouldn’t even KNOW, because you shouldn’t even TRY to log into some shit you ain’t supposed to be in. Let me just say something about integrity okay? Have some. Cool. When I no longer work somewhere, one of the first things I do is log out of everything, then go to my password manager and delete each and everything connected with that place. Not because I am worried I might sneak back in to do free work for shits and giggles. It’s so I can never accidentally log into their shit instead of mine. I’m sorry, this isn’t looking good.
Lammers attributed the problem to the state and national party, saying they had “failed to limit access” to Sims after he left.
“He acted quickly to alert the appropriate people to rectify the matter, and the access was turned off by the party authorities,” Lammers said.
Lammers is the Steyer Campaign Spokesman. So, he’s saying that Sim’s did nothing wrong and was just helping out? Using old access passwords and usernames he knew he wasn’t supposed to use is really the fault of the DNC? Oh, shit. Didn’t Bernie sue the DNC after his campaign accessed Hillary’s files? Yep.
Lammers initially suggested Sims had inadvertently downloaded Harris’ data believing that it was Steyer’s, not realizing that he had logged in to an old party account instead of the Steyer campaign account.
I wish you could see my fucking face right now. Really? That was the story you decided to tell the world?
But Hinojosa said that the DNC system showed Sims had downloaded the data at 3 p.m., three minutes after he had notified the party that he still had access and while they were working to revoke it.
Oh. My. Fucking. God. Oh!! How are you gonna sit up there and say some bullshit about “It was an accident!” and continue downloading AFTER you report your accidental access? Muthafucka! Ain’t nobody stupid, ok, Chief?
Still, Lammers faulted the DNC.
“We are talking about 180 seconds in a system that is notoriously inaccurate,” Lammers said. “And the DNC is not disputing the key fact that our employee proactively approached them to inform them of the matter. The bottom line is that nothing would have taken place if the DNC had been more diligent about the security of voter data.”
Here is a photo of that cocky jerkface.
Well, it looks like we’re in for some more fuckery, go read everything else at Post and Courier, they broke this story and I have a feeling this ain’t over by a long shot. I mean, this hasn’t even been blamed on Kamala, Hilary, or Obama yet. Stay Tuned.