March 29, 2020 0 Comments Corona Stimulus, Featured, News, Politics

“Where’s My ‘Rona Check?!”– Ten Questions Asked and Answered

Photo by Alexander Mils on Unsplash

The Corona Virus Stimulus Bill has finally come to pass, and not a minute too soon for struggling families and small businesses. On Wednesday night the Senate finally pushed through a bill that has, strangely enough, been credited to Bernie Sanders. You heard me, Bernie got credit even though he wasn’t in town working on the bill all week, instead choosing to give virtual Pep Rally to his live stream audience. Totaling over 800 pages, and weighing in at over 2 trillion dollars, this stimulus plan is twice the size of the TARP bill that Leftists and Bernie Sanders have spent years railing against, calling it a corporate giveaway. Now, faced with the worldwide health crisis the Corona Virus Pandemic has become, and with workers nationwide unable to work unless in an essential job, Congress was forced to act before it was too late. 

So, WTF is even in the Stimulus plan? I have spent the past two days reading through it, and from the endless amount of words I read I have gleaned this: A whole lot of shit is in the plan. There was actually so much in the plan that I will just let someone else break it down and I’ll comment, hahaha!

New Yorker:

The package, which the House of Representatives will vote on Friday, consists of five major measures: cash payments of up to twelve hundred dollars for almost all Americans; an expansion of the unemployment-insurance system that would raise benefits and enable gig workers as well as regular employees to receive them; a three-hundred-and-sixty-billion-dollar assistance program for small businesses; a five-hundred-billion-dollar bailout fund for big businesses; plus hundreds of billions of dollars in emergency funding for states, hospitals, and other medical providers.

There also happened to be some money in it for HBCUs, so Matt Gaetz tried to have a hissy fit about it, but he got checked hard by Kamala Harris, and I haven’t heard a peep out of him since.

Yes. She made him look stupid and racist because he was being stupid and racist.

So, we knew this was going to be a shitty deal with corporate giveaways galore, but most people right now just want to know how much they will get and if they will even qualify.. I have compiled the ten most common questions I see people ask when discussing the Stimulus payments that go directly into the hand of The People. Unlike the plan Trump proposed, these payments won’t be regressive, with high earners getting more, and will instead have high earners getting less and the poor and working class getting the maximum benefit. 

1.  How much will we receive as payments?

NBC News:

Depends on how much you make.

If you made less than $75,000 in 2019, you will be eligible for the full payment of $1,200. Couples who filed jointly and made less than $150,000 will get $2,400. An individual who filed as “head of household” and earned $112,500 or less gets $1,200.

So, as you can see, $1200 is the highest amount you can get, and once your earnings get too high the amount gets lower and lower until it’s zeroed out. This stimulus payment isn’t for the wealthy, so, sorry to all the movers and shakers, you won’t be getting any pocket change from Uncle Sam on this end. You’d better try to get some stimulus for your businesses.

For every child in the household, you will receive an additional $500.

I guess they don’t reduce that amount based on household income, but don’t quote me.

If you made more than $75,000, your payment will be reduced by $5 for every $100 of income that exceeds the limits. So if you made $80,000 in 2019, you will receive $950. The payment decreases to zero for an individual making $99,000 or more or a couple making $198,000 or more.

If you’re a family of four, you’ll be eligible for a maximum of $3,400.

I’m pretty sure most people reading this blog qualify for SOME amount.

2. When is my money coming?

The Mnuchin guy says that it will be around 3 weeks before payments begin arriving, but don’t trust him because he works for Trump and Trump will only hire liars.

Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin said Wednesday the checks will be sent out “within three weeks” to people for whom the IRS has information. You don’t need to sign up or fill out a form to receive a payment if you’ve been working and paying taxes since 2018.

The Treasury Department will also run a “public awareness campaign” with information about the program, including for people who didn’t file a tax return for 2018 or 2019.

I am not sure, but I believe this means you will have had to have filed taxes last year to have a payment sent to you automatically, otherwise you are reliant upon Mnuchin’s “Public Awareness Campaign” which will probably consist of Trump extolling his own virtues and claiming that they money comes directly from him.

3. Where do we sign up?

We don’t. If you have filed your taxes and the IRS has your most up to date information, the payment will come automatically. So, if you have not filed taxes, even if you are on SSI or some form of Public Assistance, you need to file your taxes as soon as possible. You can check this website to see if there has been any change in the status of payments. 

4. Do non-citizens qualify for payments?

It depends.

Yes — as long as you’re living and working in the U.S. with a valid Social Security number. That includes green card holders, and it generally includes those on work visas, such as an H-1B and H-2A. But it generally excludes visitors and people who are in the U.S. illegally.

Kinda seems unfair that people who live here and put money into the system can’t get a little help, but this is a bill signed by a GOP President, so we can’t expect anything from him ever in regards to compassion. Please remember I said this if Trump and the GOP suddenly start saying undocumented immigrants can sign up for payments. Do not listen to them, they are full of shit and will just be plotting on you so he can deport you. Do NOT tell those MFs where you live, ever. Never trust the Government while Trump is in office.

5. Do we have to pay the money back?

No. You’ll pay indirectly through suffering and pain. 

6. Do US territories qualify?

Yes. This is not because Trump wants you to have it, it’s because he cannot defeat Nancy Pelosi head up. 

7. Will I get my money if I owe back taxes?

Yes. Trump wouldn’t let a little tax evasion or nonpayment get in the way of you getting your funds. Not because he gives a shit about you, but because he hates paying his own taxes. He prefers to have tax credits for himself, that way he gets out of paying for years when he bankrupts some businesses he owns. 

8. I owe back child support, will I get the full payment?

Not if you have been reported to the US Treasury Department by your state. I mean, your kids come first, right? Right. But. you knew that already, until you pay your debt down you won’t be receiving a dime without a deduction of four to five cents taken out first. 

9. Can I get a payment if I am homeless or just got released from jail or prison?

Yes. You’ll have to wait until they set up a system to handle your claim. If you have an address you currently get your mail at, it’s likely that if you file taxes now, the IRS will send you a check. Then, you may not have to wait for Mnuchin to actually do some work. 

10. Is this money taxable?


If you have more questions, well, that’s too bad. I have kindly linked you to the 800+ page bill and you can have yourself a merry old time reading through that…legislation. I did not enjoy reading it whatsoever and do not intend to ever read a line of it again. But, if you are curious about some of the other provisions, click the link and get to reading how the money gets moved around, check out which programs get a boost, and read the parts for the state funding to find out why Governor Cuomo is not Trumps most satisfied customer.


‘‘Coronavirus Aid, Relief, and Economic Security Act’’ or the ‘‘CARES Act’’

New Yorker

NBC News

Alaska sucks and we are cut off from Civilization!! Everyone donate to my survival fund and I’ll try to survive the wilderness!